There is a question that keeps ringing inside my head today. My best friend, Kath asked me how to get over someone. Point-blank, I really didn’t know the answer because I didn’t want to give her common, cliché answers such as get a new guy. She deserves a better answer than that because, after all, she is my best friend.
I’ve known Kath since we were still in grade school. We used to hate each other, well, you know kids, always trying to annoy and tease each other. We ended up being friends when we were in detention for 3 months. She put gum on my head and I retaliated bad. I thought it was going to be really the worst 3 months of my life but it was all good. We both realized that we have something in common such as we’re both the only girl among our siblings, we’re both adventurous people and we love pizza a lot! We can eat pizza three times a day for week. We often go out on road trips and camping with our other friends
When Kath asked me that question, I wanted to help her so I asked what happened. I let her go through all the details. They met in college; he is a friend of a friend of hers. They started out by having group dates every week then dated solo. They started fresh, just chilling but as they go on, everything fell out. She has a very controlling boyfriend who always needs to get a hold of her. She always needed to tell him wherever she goes even if it’s just around her neighbourhood or when she goes out with friends. She felt suffocated at times but she loves him deeply. The last straw was when he didn’t want her to go out with her parents for no reason at all. He made her choose between him or her family so she chose the latter.
Kath still loves him but she doesn’t want to go through all that again. Her boyfriend John, haven’t contacted her since, maybe he’s still pissed off at her for choosing her family. I told Kath that there’s no easy way to get over him and it’s not wise to find somebody for a rebound relationship. It’s just going to make things more complicated. I told her she has to take it one step at a time; she can’t magically forget all the memories she had with him because truthfully, you can’t. The past will always be a part of you. What I can only do is listen and always be a good friend. Lately, I always make her come with me on photo shoots and errands. She used to love photography so I’m trying to get her to be hooked again to maybe divert her depression to her old hobby. This week, we’re going camping with my photography club. I told her she can come as I have a spare DSLR to lend her. I hope she can get back on her feet soon; I miss the old goofy kind of Kath who always makes me laugh.